Living for Today…

Some random things about me…

I love to read, it is my favorite thing to do and I have decided that my goal for the next couple of years (probably three) is to read the top 100 novels of all time.  The beach is my haven, along with my room.  I love to cuddle up in my bed with lots of sheets and blankets during a thunderstorm.  I am a horrible singer yet I bust it out whenever I drive or am alone.  I hate to run.  I love swimming.  I wish I was more in shape than I am now.  If I could, I would have never stopped swimming- I miss it more than I admit.  If I could I would live in Europe for a year, just traveling, exploring, and doing “history research”.  I have a list of 30 things I want to before I die, including sky diving and riding an extremly tall rollercoaster.  Both of those things I feel would kill me, so its hard to decide which one to do first.  I have a lot of crazy fears, like of heights and spiders.  I count random things.  I actually like math, and attempted to be a math teacher for about 3 weeks of calculus… then I gave up.  I complain too much, which has caused me to not be as successful in my swimming as I wanted to be.  I do have regrets in my life, even though I wish I could take the attitude that you don’t have regrets because at one point it was what you wanted.  I over think way too many things and worry too much about things that have not happened and probably never will happen.  I lost my dad when I was 13- he died in our house while I was home.  I still have horrible flashbacks if I see an ambulence or just a sudden wave a grief.  I don’t tell people my dad has died because then they give you the “look” of pity.  I use to daydream and pretend that he was just on an extended vacation or business trip.  My nieces and my nephews are the cuttest things… I love them to death and can’t wait to have my own kids.  I want the fairtale love story with the big wedding… although I know that life isn’t really like that, I still like to daydream about it.  I use to write little stories when I was a kid.  One was about my family dying and Leonardo DiCaprio adopting me as his kid.  Yes, I was just a little obssessed with him.  I think I saw Titanic over 10 times?  At least three of those were in the movie theater.  I love watching action movies where people get blown up and what not- its not as predictable as the lovely dovey chick flicks.  My mom already has my father of the bride song picked out.  Its one of my favorite songs.  My sister is called Big One, even though people think I am older.  I use to not be able to stand her but now its weird if I don’t see her every other week.  My biggest fear in life right now is failing as a teacher- I am completely scared that I am going to mess up when I start to teach.  Sometimes I wish I could just curl up all day with a good book, a cup of coffee, and some chocolate.  I hate my job walking backwards.  I love to eat sweets, thus the weight issue of my life has always been a problem.  I am insecure about parts of my body, and sometimes have had low self-esteem because of it.  I tend to be a very sarcastic person.  I laugh really loud.  I am and will always be a tomboy- although I use to be a bigger tomboy as a kid.  I have a very small fashion sense.  My faith is one that is every changing, going up and down and all around.  But, when looking at everything it is the one thing that has consistently been with me through my ups, downs, doubts, successes, and failures. 

Thats it for now…